Coolidge effect in Relationships

Coolidge effect in Relationships


The plan of nature has a weakness or a bug. It would not help the spread of our genes to marry and remain committed to the first person we fall in love with. The spread of genes is the top priority of nature.

The strategy does not take into consideration our own happiness. Therefore, practically all mammals, including humans, have an innate, antiquated mechanism known as The Coolidge Effect.

It works to encourage us to look for "new" mating partners once our duty of fertilization seems to be finished. It functions by creating ennui or tolerance to the same stimuli or individual. Their presence gradually stops being as "rewarding" to the primitive brain.

Over time, our desire for the same things just diminishes.

The phrase "The Coolidge Effect" is said to have its roots here. The President and Mrs. Coolidge were being led about a government experiment farm separately. When [Mrs. Coolidge] arrived at the poultry yard, she saw a rooster frequently mating. The attendant said, "Dozens of times per day," when she inquired about how frequently that occurred. Mrs. Coolidge gave the order to tell the President about that when he arrived. The President inquired, "Same hen every time?" after being informed. Oh no, Mr. President, a different and unique hen every time, was the response. Tell Mrs. Coolidge about that, Mr. President.

Because bulls will only mate with a cow once every season, farmers are well aware of this. In order to fertilize the entire herd, they will go looking for new cows in the field. This archaic strategy of dispersing as many genes as possible is incompatible with the more civilized lives we lead now. We wish to become close and remain devoted for as long as we can. Religions and communities have employed a variety of techniques to circumvent this problem, including permitting men to have numerous wives, marrying them off early, fostering large kids to keep them occupied, and turning a blind eye to mistresses, among other things.

According to the Coolidge effect, we develop stronger feelings for a new sexual partner when they enter the picture. Although there are some subtleties, it has been shown to exist in both humans and other species.

According to the biological reason, our dopamine levels rise when there is a chance of starting a new sexual relationship with a new or different person. Our excitement grows as a result of this growth.

Is this outcome solely a biological one? What connection does it have to infidelity, open partnerships, or a need for porn? Can the Coolidge effect harm your relationship when you fall in love? Or is the risk reduced?

What are some ways that the Coolidge effect affects relationships? Some scholars contend that this phenomena is what causes things like infidelity, pornography, or the growing number of couples who choose open relationships over traditional monogamy.

In actuality, novelty is what draws us. The Coolidge effect is explained by how much we enjoy and are excited by it. However, not everyone will ultimately choose to be unfaithful, much like not everyone enjoys erotica in movies. However, the Coolidge effect might help to explain how this kind of behavior manifests itself occasionally.

For instance, access to numerous pornographic videos featuring wildly disparate protagonists keeps dopamine levels high.

The Coolidge effect may make some evolutionary sense in animals that want to preserve their genetic diversity and number of offspring for future generations. Humans, on the other hand, make extrapolation more difficult. For instance, when you fall in love, all you want is to be with your loved one and you don't really care about the novelty part.

All of this can, however, be connected to dopamine. That's because its levels—along with those of other hormones—increase dramatically when you fall in love. Your dopamine levels are also high when something really surprises you, like when you encounter novel experiences.

However, specialists claim that your dopamine levels start to fall as your relationship enters a routine phase. This indicates that you are considerably calmer now than you were at the start of your relationship. Therefore, this is when the Coolidge effect might manifest.

The Coolidge effect has been proven in mammals (rodents), as we have discussed, as well as in people. After sex is one instance of this. In fact, the so-called refractory period does indeed exist in men after ejaculating. It will take them until then to arouse them once more. It often lasts a few minutes, depending on many conditions.

However, when the man is with a new partner, this period shortens. The Coolidge effect would partially be explained by this. Therefore, maintaining a connection through adjustments to sexual routine, novel positions, sex toys, etc., might be beneficial in this regard.

As you can see, not everyone will experience the Coolidge effect in the same way, despite the fact that it has been studied in humans. Without a doubt, novelty is alluring, particularly on a "biological" level, but there are nuances.

On the other hand, this phenomenon has biological roots. Not to mention that we are both animals and people, therefore the most human and logical aspects, as well as those connected to sentiments, also play a part in this. As a result, these specific characteristics or aspects of the person may modify the Coolidge effect.

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Contributed by: - Dr (Prof) R K Suri Clinical Psychologist & Ms. Aditi Bhardwaj