Coolidge effect in Relationships
The plan of nature has a weakness or a bug. It
would not help the spread of our genes to marry and remain committed to the
first person we fall in love with. The spread of genes is the top priority of
nature.
The strategy does not take into consideration our own
happiness. Therefore, practically all mammals, including humans, have an
innate, antiquated mechanism known as The Coolidge Effect.
It works to encourage us to look for "new" mating
partners once our duty of fertilization seems to be finished. It functions by
creating ennui or tolerance to the same stimuli or individual. Their presence
gradually stops being as "rewarding" to the primitive brain.
Over time, our desire for the same things just diminishes.
The phrase "The Coolidge Effect" is said to have
its roots here. The President and Mrs. Coolidge were being led about a
government experiment farm separately. When [Mrs. Coolidge] arrived at the
poultry yard, she saw a rooster frequently mating. The attendant said,
"Dozens of times per day," when she inquired about how frequently
that occurred. Mrs. Coolidge gave the order to tell the President about that
when he arrived. The President inquired, "Same hen every time?" after
being informed. Oh no, Mr. President, a different and unique hen every time,
was the response. Tell Mrs. Coolidge about that, Mr. President.
Because bulls will only mate with a cow once every season,
farmers are well aware of this. In order to fertilize the entire herd, they
will go looking for new cows in the field. This archaic strategy of dispersing
as many genes as possible is incompatible with the more civilized lives we lead
now. We wish to become close and remain devoted for as long as we can.
Religions and communities have employed a variety of techniques to circumvent
this problem, including permitting men to have numerous wives, marrying them
off early, fostering large kids to keep them occupied, and turning a blind eye
to mistresses, among other things.
According to the Coolidge effect, we develop stronger
feelings for a new sexual partner when they enter the picture. Although there
are some subtleties, it has been shown to exist in both humans and other
species.
According to the biological reason, our dopamine levels rise
when there is a chance of starting a new sexual relationship with a new or
different person. Our excitement grows as a result of this growth.
Is this outcome solely a biological one? What connection
does it have to infidelity, open partnerships, or a need for porn? Can the
Coolidge effect harm your relationship when you fall in love? Or is the risk reduced?
What are some ways that the Coolidge effect affects
relationships? Some scholars contend that this phenomena is what causes things
like infidelity, pornography, or the growing number of couples who choose open
relationships over traditional monogamy.
In actuality, novelty is what draws us. The Coolidge effect
is explained by how much we enjoy and are excited by it. However, not everyone
will ultimately choose to be unfaithful, much like not everyone enjoys erotica
in movies. However, the Coolidge effect might help to explain how this kind of
behavior manifests itself occasionally.
For instance, access to numerous pornographic videos
featuring wildly disparate protagonists keeps dopamine levels high.
The Coolidge effect may make some evolutionary sense in
animals that want to preserve their genetic diversity and number of offspring
for future generations. Humans, on the other hand, make extrapolation more
difficult. For instance, when you fall in love, all you want is to be with your
loved one and you don't really care about the novelty part.
All of this can, however, be connected to dopamine. That's
because its levels—along with those of other hormones—increase dramatically
when you fall in love. Your dopamine levels are also high when something really
surprises you, like when you encounter novel experiences.
However, specialists claim that your dopamine levels start
to fall as your relationship enters a routine phase. This indicates that you are
considerably calmer now than you were at the start of your relationship.
Therefore, this is when the Coolidge effect might manifest.
The Coolidge effect has been proven in mammals (rodents), as
we have discussed, as well as in people. After sex is one instance of this. In
fact, the so-called refractory period does indeed exist in men after
ejaculating. It will take them until then to arouse them once more. It often
lasts a few minutes, depending on many conditions.
However, when the man is with a new partner, this period
shortens. The Coolidge effect would partially be explained by this. Therefore,
maintaining a connection through adjustments to sexual routine, novel
positions, sex toys, etc., might be beneficial in this regard.
As you can see, not everyone will experience the Coolidge
effect in the same way, despite the fact that it has been studied in humans.
Without a doubt, novelty is alluring, particularly on a "biological"
level, but there are nuances.
On the other hand, this phenomenon has biological roots. Not
to mention that we are both animals and people, therefore the most human and
logical aspects, as well as those connected to sentiments, also play a part in
this. As a result, these specific characteristics or aspects of the person may
modify the Coolidge effect.
Couples
Therapy, also
known as Marriage Counselling, helps couples strengthen their emotional and sexual
intimacy, experience greater satisfaction in their relationship, atone for past
infidelities and sensitivities, and cultivate healthier habits. If you're
looking for the best Online Marriage counsellor come to TalktoAngel for affordable,
confidential, and comfortable Online Counselling.
You can consult the best
clinical psychologist at Delhi NCRs at Psychowellness Center,
Dwarka, Janakpuri, Gurugram, NOIDA, Pitampura, VasantVihar, Delhi
#psychologistdwarka, #lifecoach, #psychologistdelhi,
#psychologistdwarka, #relationship #couplecounsellor, #marriagecounsellor,
#psychologist
Contributed by: - Dr (Prof) R K Suri Clinical Psychologist & Ms. Aditi Bhardwaj
SHARE