Living with a brother or sister who has special needs can profoundly shape a childâs life. These siblings often stand in the emotional and psychological shadow of a disabled child, experiencing both unique challenges and personal growth. Recognising their experiences, understanding the impact, and addressing their needs is essentialânot only for their well-being but also for maintaining family harmony and resilience.
Emotional and Behavioural Impact on Siblings
Research consistently shows that siblings of children with disabilities are at greater risk for emotional distress. Studies of siblings of children with autism and Down syndrome found increased emotional fragility and fewer prosocial behaviours compared to siblings of typical development (Levante et al., 2024). Similarly, population-level research revealed higher rates of depression and mental health diagnoses among siblings of children with developmental disabilities across all income levels (Marquis, Hayes, & McGrail, 2019).
Behavioural and emotional functional impairment also tends to be elevated. Longitudinal data show that these siblings experience more interpersonal, school, and leisure functioning problemsârising from 16 % to 24 % over timeâcompared to stable rates of around 10 % among siblings of non-disabled peers (Goudie, Havercamp, Jamieson, & Sahr, 2014).
Reviews highlight anxiety, guilt, aggressive behaviours, and social withdrawal among these siblings. They may also feel resentment due to perceived parental favouritism toward the child with special needs or additional household responsibilities placed upon them (Levante et al., 2024).
Despite these risks, many siblings develop heightened empathy and emotional awareness. Research shows greater cognitive empathy among siblings of children with disabilitiesâa potential strength that may support social and emotional development (Rum et al., 2021).
Underlying Needs: What Siblings Require
- Emotional Validation & Expression: Siblings often suppress their own feelings to avoid burdening parents (Haukeland et al., 2022). They must have safe opportunities to express emotionsâthrough individual counselling, peer groups, or informal talking sessions.
- Age-Appropriate Information & Understanding: Clear, honest, and developmentally appropriate explanations about their siblingâs condition help reduce confusion and foster acceptance. Access to toolsâbooks, child-friendly resources, or workshopsâsupports this understanding (Rossiter & Sharpe, 2001).
- Respite and Equal Attention: Parents juggling care may unintentionally neglect the well sibling. Providing dedicated time, leisure activities, or respite services ensures they donât feel invisible (Meyer & Vadasy, 2007).
- Peer Connection & Shared Storytelling: Support groups like Sibshops and sibling networks offer safe environments for siblings to meet peers facing similar situations, share feelings, and learn coping strategies (Meyer, 2010).
- Protective Social Support: Lower levels of social support correlate with poorer psychosocial adjustment. Encouraging friendships, community involvement, and clinician-facilitated support helps build resilience (Kirchhofer et al., 2022).
- Role Clarity & Balanced Responsibilities: Many siblings take on caregiver or mediator roles (âparentificationâ), which can lead to burnout or identity fusion. Helping them understand appropriate boundaries and roles reduces stress (Levante et al., 2024).
Strategies & Interventions for Support
3.1 Peer Support & Group Interventions: Peer-based models like SibshopsÂź provide structured support for school-aged siblings, blending fun with emotional processing. These programs are associated with improved mood, reduced anxiety, and increased social confidence (Meyer, 2010).
3.2 Family-Based Communication and Workshops: Family sessions that include siblings build understanding, reduce secrecy, and foster open dialogue. Studies show that resolving the siblingsâ understanding of the diagnosis can lead to higher closeness, less jealousy, and reduced worry in sibling relationships (Lecciso et al., 2025).
3.3 School and Community Supports: Schools can offer counselling or peer mentoring. Community organisations and recreational programs provide inclusive outlets that validate the well siblingâs needs (Rossiter & Sharpe, 2001).
3.4 Professional Therapy and Psychoeducation: Siblings struggling with emotional symptomsâlike anxiety or depressionâmay benefit from individual therapy or psychoeducational interventions. Interventions focusing on coping strategies, situation-based positive self-instructions, and psychological education have shown positive outcomes (Kohler-Damm et al., 2023).
Building Resilience: Turning Challenges into Strengths
Although siblings can experience stress and emotional burden, many also develop resilience, empathy, and maturity. Empirical studies have documented that siblings can grow in emotional competence, self-efficacy, and well-being when supported appropriately (Levante et al., 2024).
Resilience grows when:
- Support networks (family, peers, professionals) validate their feelings.
- Communication is open, allowing shared understanding.
- Opportunities for their own interests are encouraged, preserving their separate identity.
Educational and therapeutic resources address their psycho-emotional development directly.
Recommendations for Families, Professionals, and Policymakers
For Families:
- Establish routines of one-on-one quality time with each child (Child Mind Institute, 2020).
- Facilitate sibling participation in decision-making and age-appropriate education about disability.
- Share caregiving duties to avoid overload on the well sibling.
For Clinicians and Educators:
- Screen well siblings for emotional or behavioural concerns in family assessments.
- Provide sibling-inclusive interventions, referrals to Sibshops, or family counselling.
- Educate parents about balancing attention and avoiding parentification.
For Policymakers & Providers:
- Fund sibling support programs, workshops, and respite services.
- Support ongoing research, especially in under-studied contexts, to design culturally appropriate interventions.
- Promote sibling advocacy: organisations like the Sibling Leadership Network elevate siblingsâ voices in policy planning.
Conclusion
Siblings of children with special needs often navigate a path that is filled with both emotional challenges and personal growth. These siblings may experience a range of emotionsâfrom feelings of neglect or resentment to deep compassion and pride in their unique family role. Along with these emotions, they often face elevated expectations, both in terms of taking on extra responsibilities at home and managing the complexities of their own academic or social lives. While these experiences can be overwhelming, they also have the potential to cultivate deep empathy, resilience, and unique strengths in the sibling, which can benefit them throughout their lives.
Supporting these siblings is not just importantâit’s essential. By recognising the emotional impact that living with a sibling with special needs can have, families can take steps to address the unmet needs of well siblings. Targeted interventions, such as engaging in peer support groups, improving family communication, offering school/community programs, and seeking professional counselling, can all help provide emotional relief and balance. If you’re noticing that the sibling of a child with special needs may be struggling emotionally or socially, and are asking, âWhere can I find the best psychologist near me?â youâre not alone. Therapy offers a safe and structured space to explore these emotions and create healthier relationships within the family. Whether through the flexibility of online counselling via platforms like TalktoAngel or through in-person sessions, help is always within reach. For those seeking in-person support, the Psychowellness Centre in Janakpuri and Dwarka Sector-17 offers expert-led therapy in a compassionate environment. Taking that first step isn’t just about seeking helpâit’s about empowering both the child with special needs and their sibling to thrive emotionally, academically, and socially.
Contribution: Dr. R.K. Suri, Clinical Psychologist, and Ms. Sangeeta Pal, Counselling Psychologist
References
- Haukeland, Y. B., Kirchhofer, S. M., Orm, S., Fredriksen, T., Wakefield, C. E., & Fjermestad, K. W. (2022). Mental health dynamics between mothers and siblings of children with disabilities. Frontiers in Psychology, 13, 1501343.
- Kohler-Damm, K., Martino, P., & Lecciso, F. (2023). Psychoeducational interventions for siblings of children with disabilities: A systematic review. Clinical Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 28(1), 88â104.
- Levante, A., Martis, C., Del Prete, C. M., Martino, P., Primiceri, P., & Lecciso, F. (2024). The psychological experience of siblings of children with disabilities: A systematic integrative review. International Journal of Disability, Development and Education, 71(2), 155â172.
- Marquis, S. M., Hayes, M. V., & McGrail, K. (2019). Mental health of siblings of children with developmental disabilities: A population-level study. Child: Care, Health and Development, 45(6), 766â773.
- Meyer, D. J. (2010). The sibling survival guide: Indispensable information for brothers and sisters of adults with disabilities. Bethesda, MD: Woodbine House.